Caffeine, my sweet nicotine substitute. My last vice. My last rebellious friend.
Buoyantly, courageously I leap into a new phase; replacing the alarming quantities of my past relationship with the former, with the latter. It is having an undesirable effect. Dizziness, head rushing uncontrollably. It must be the caffeine. Or maybe the drugs of the past have after all done irreparable damage and I will be stuck fast in this relentless uncertain state until I meet my sorry demise.
Each movement makes me feel as if I am falling from a great height. I try to take a drink of water to steady myself and in the process knock myself off balance. Suddenly I am falling, nowhere. As if that were possible whilst lying perfectly still and completely rigidly on a sofa.
What’s this now?
Who are those people..bounding rudely into my vision, disturbing my already disturbed mind?
Oh, it’s no one. They are hallucinationatory figments of nothing.
My vision is suddenly reminiscent of that sort-of snow on televisions that weren’t properly tuned in; back then, before the digital revolution. I feel as if I am looking at the world through steamed up glasses with scratches and black spots.
This is life in fuzzy, budget low resolution.