
Skin
Sometimes it feels like this body hasn’t got my back
My face painted with red,
my skin starts to crack
My soft shell is breaking
screaming, aching Continue reading “Skin”

Shopping
It happens on days
when I feel most empty
When my fragile mind
can’t settle
it focuses on things
I don’t want or need. Continue reading “Shopping”

I know what you did Damien
I know what you did Damien
I saw your forgotten corporate cup
once full of unfairly traded ground up beans,
silky, milky faded dreams, Continue reading “I know what you did Damien”

Kids
The kind of love
where minds meet
Giggling into the night
tucked under our sheets Continue reading “Kids”

Anatomically speaking
Sometimes
I want my body to show you how I’ve changed.
My skin with a healthy glow
with fewer scars, marks, creases.
My stomach less indulged,
more starved. Continue reading “Anatomically speaking”

The book
And when I close that book
His book,
after all these years
Peeling back the pages,
all that’s left is sadness
at the core.
But my sadness
doesn’t belong to him
anymore. Continue reading “The book”

And yet the sun shines again
And I’ve seen you in 1000 faces
And I’ve whispered your name
Into the wind
again and again
Awaiting a response,
nothing comes.
And yet the sun shines again. Continue reading “And yet the sun shines again”

Sleepwalking
How much of my life I have been sleepwalking
How often I have wandered blind,
eyes glazed, body stiff, heart closed. Continue reading “Sleepwalking”

OCD
I once thought you were my friend
My only comfort.
My only certainty.
In a world that posed only
questions, loss, fear. Continue reading “OCD”

Ode to little black digit box
Is that your phone?
Exclaims the 100th being this week
Yes, this is my phone
Eternal source of disappointment
But it allows me to speak
To be heard. Continue reading “Ode to little black digit box”

Things
All these things
unwanted things
in a cycle of constant removal
finding a way to make space in this existence. Continue reading “Things”

Outlines
And it’s been 1, 2 years now
But I still falter when I hear your name
And I’m left with a bitter taste in my mouth
Because I can’t find anyone else to blame Continue reading “Outlines”

Shadows
She is fading
Yesterdays hang in the air
Threatening to take her
She grows fainter
Back then she seemed so clear
But distance spreads out
It’s been 4 years. Continue reading “Shadows”

The bridge
I wonder if a day will come
when the words will stop
falling out of my head
tumbling softly onto the page
cushioning my fall.
I worry about that. Continue reading “The bridge”

Porcelain
I don’t want to grow old and look young
I don’t want a porcelain face that doesn’t shatter when it feels
I don’t want a body that defies gravity
I want mine to be grounded. Continue reading “Porcelain”

Ode to van
Oh little van, little sweat box, little tin can
containing all my most needed
most treasured
my most hated items. Continue reading “Ode to van”

His
Addiction
he softens my grip
Strokes his path through my fingertips
And then I’m his.
And then I’m his.

Borrowed
And he said that it’s normal
that it’s a human reaction
but I’m dizzy, from this spiralling
from this everlasting spiralling

Panic room
Laying silently
watching ferocious flames
through a tiny window pane
and this is enough
this is enough
this is enough.

Landslide
Open up, she said, look outside yourself
But my head is on the landslide Continue reading “Landslide”

The raven
The bleak black raven soars alone through the sky
In its solitary kingdom
It swoops down around my lost and lonely frame
Effortless and free Continue reading “The raven”

Building
Riding on a glimmer of hope
He feels like home
But I’m lost in the cracks
Of that clarity of mind we lack

Emma
And I’m still here, waiting to face another day
Trying to grasp at last memories
Pondering for a while
Our last words, the smell of your clothes, the contours of that infectious smile

Bitter/sweet
Lost again
footsteps outside
but they won’t bring my strength
they just mark the end
And they won’t belong to him
because he is lost now too Continue reading “Bitter/sweet”

Making home
I wonder if I will ever stop
carefully arranging
this disorder that surrounds me.
Continue reading “Making home”

The night bus
Fragranced with soft notes of McDonald’s
and the distant alluring aroma of sweat and sick.
Carefully decorated with
a stray plastic bag,
a forgotten scarf,
a half devoured bag of Wotsits.
Continue reading “The night bus”

Alive not living
Another day I awaken here
but I don’t feel so alive
witnessing a nation’s downward spiral
doesn’t ignite national pride. Continue reading “Alive not living”